Expectations
by Medie Shanachie
Summary: Getting a surprise like this wasn't what Danny was expecting when he attempted to have a relationship. He wasn't ready for this...at all.


_Author's note: CSI:NY fanfic; pre-series. This was written quite a while ago and then I decided I didn't want to write the longer story. For some reason this story just kind of languished on my hard drive and I apparently never did anything with it. So um one-shot cuz I am not gonna do anything else with this.  
_

_Special thanks to __**Gothie** for all her assistance and encouragement and for just being gothie! Special thanks to __**Sheta Storm** for the title to this story since I couldn't seem to think of anything. And finally special thanks to __**Ashy**for reading this before it was finished and loving it and just for being an NYC girl! _

* * *

Danny Messer quietly let himself into the apartment. He shrugged off his jacket and hung it on the hook by the door, then unclipped his holster and set his gun on the table. He untied his boots and slipped them off, then walked on sock feet through the apartment. The shades were drawn in his bedroom and he paused in the doorway until his eyes adjusted. Melinda was laying in almost the exact position he had left her in that morning. "Hey," he called softly, waiting until her eyes opened to continue, "you feeling any better?"

"A little bit. Donnie came by and took me to the doctor," Melinda answered.

Danny gingerly sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing her back gently. "Yeah? That was nice of him. What did the doc say?"

"She's supposed to call me before six. She took some blood and did some tests and stuff."

Danny glanced at the clock, checking the time. "Okay. You want something to eat? Some soup or something?"

She shook her head. "No thanks. Donnie bought me some ginger ale. Can I have some of that?"

"Yeah. Sure." He pressed a gentle kiss on her head, then got up and left the room. After pulling one of the cans out of the fridge and opening it to flatten it a little, he picked through the take-out containers. Finally choosing the least offensive, he dumped it onto a plate and stuck it in the microwave. He poured the soda into a glass and stirred it for a few minutes, then put a straw in, and pulled his dinner out. Snagging a beer from the fridge, he carried it all into the bedroom. "Is the smell..." he started, then stopped when he saw Melinda was on the phone.

"All right, Janice, thanks," she was saying as he took a seat on the bed again and handed her the glass. "When does she want me to come in again?" She nodded. "Fine. I'll call then. Bye."

"That the doc?" Danny asked once she had closed her cell and set it back on the nightstand. "She gonna call in a script for you or something?"

"Yeah, it was. And there's nothing she can give me."

Danny took a bit of his take-out. "What is it? Some kinda virus?"

"No. More like a parasite."

He looked puzzled. "Parasite? Where the hell did you pick up a parasite?"

"From you." Melinda took a sip of the ginger ale he had gotten for her, then decided to take pity on him since he looked so confused. "Danny, I'm pregnant."

He choked on the drink of beer he had just taken. When he stopped coughing, he said, "I'm sorry. You're what? How?"

"You inserted tab a into slot b," Melinda responded dryly. "Danny, don't be an idiot. I know we don't need to have a birds and bees talk. You know the mechanics quite well."

"But...I mean." He flailed wildly. "We're careful."

She took his plate from him before he dumped it all over the bed. "Obviously not careful enough. I'm a little over a month along."

"What are you going to do?"

She glared at him. "Don't you mean what are _we_ going to do?"

"Hey, it's your body, Melly, it's your decision. I'll tell you now though that I am _not_ ready for that responsibility. I'm not prepared to be a father or to have a baby."

Melinda shoved the blankets off her body and got out of bed. "And you think _I_ am?" she demanded as she grabbed her jeans. "At least you had the decency not to ask me if it was yours."

Danny got to his feet as she jerked on street clothes and shoved things into the bag she used to bring stuff over to his apartment. "What are you doing?" he asked.

Melinda glanced around the room and made sure she had everything of hers that she would need immediately. "Since you aren't ready for this, I'm going home. You call me when you're ready to man up." Before he could think of a response, she slammed out of the room and apartment.

**(Two Days Later)**

Danny entered the tech lab cautiously, unsure of the reception Melinda would give him, then stopped in surprise when he realized someone else was sitting at her station. All of her personal effects had been stripped from the station he realized after a moment and he looked around wondering if she had been moved. "Where's Melinda?" he asked the guy sitting there.

"Ask the boss woman," he responded, pointing at the Asian woman across the room.

Danny crossed over to her and almost backed away from the force of the glare she was giving him. "You are persona non grata right now, Messer," she informed him when he came within hearing range. "You cost me my best tech! I don't want to see you unless it pertains to a case."

"What did I do?" Danny asked in confusion. "Where's Melinda?"

"She quit! Walked in yesterday morning and gave her two week notice, said she'd work it out of office. So I'm out a tech and my best one at that. What did you do to her?" she asked.

"How do you know it was something I did?" Danny responded.

The woman pulled something out of her pocket, took Danny's hand, and slapped it into it. Danny closed his fist around the keys to his apartment. "She gave me those and told me to give them to you when you came looking for her. She also told me to give you the message, 'Fuck off, Messer'. So whatever you did to her, I would suggest you not go looking for her. Now get out of here before you cost me another tech."

Danny shoved the keys into his pocket and slunk out of the lab. Now he had no idea how to find Melinda. She wasn't answering her phone and she wasn't at her apartment. So far no one was willing to tell him where she was.

**(Three Days Later)**

Aiden Burn, another CSI, groaned as they pulled up in front of the apartment building. "Messer, you're nuts. She's gonna kill you."

Danny slammed the truck into park. "I just want to see if she's here and make sure she's okay. If she's fine, I'll leave her alone. You coming up?"

Aiden flipped the 'on duty' sign down so they wouldn't get towed and followed him as he got out of the vehicle. "Yeah, I'll go. Make sure she doesn't commit murder. Actually, I'll just call it in and start processing if she does do it. Then I'll tell the judge it was justifiable homicide."

"Oh, you're a laugh riot, Burn," Danny replied as they entered the vestibule. He hit the button for Melinda's apartment and waited until he got an answer. "This is Detective Messer," he answered the question. "I'd like to talk to Melinda Costas."

"She's not here, Detective," the disembodied voice responded.

"Could you buzz me up and talk to me for a minute?" Danny asked.

"Yeah, I guess." A moment later, the door clicked open.

Danny shrugged at Aiden's look and pulled the door open, motioning her in ahead of him. He veered towards the stairs, knowing from experience that the elevator wasn't always trustworthy. When they reached the fourth floor, he led the way to the correct door, and pounded on it. A moment later, a young woman that he recognized as one of Melinda's roommates opened the door. He held his badge up so she could see it. "I'm Danny Messer."

She nodded. "I know who you are. Melinda's not here."

"Okay. When will she be back?" Danny responded agreeably.

"She won't." She shrugged. "She came by a day or so ago with a couple of her cousins and packed up all her stuff. She told me I could have the furniture and she paid next month's rent. I don't know where she went."

Danny resisted the urge to swear. "Do you know which cousins?"

"Yeah. Don, Paddy, and Micah. But none of them said where she was going. Is she in trouble?"

Danny shook his head. "No. We had a fight and she's avoiding me. I just didn't think she would go to these lengths."

"Well, sorry, I couldn't be more help. I've gotta go now." She pushed him aside gently and stepped out of the apartment, shutting the door behind her. "I'm late for work."

The two detectives watched her jog down the hall. "You think she was telling the truth?" Aiden asked as they followed at a slower pace.

Danny sighed. "Unfortunately, yes. Melinda seems to be covering her tracks well."

"You know she knows where to find you. Once she calms down, she might just call you."

"Aiden, she said I was to call her when I was ready to 'man up'. Somehow I don't think she's calling me."

Aiden took the keys out of his hand and got in the driver's seat. "Face it, partner," she told him as she started the engine. "If that's the truth...you're screwed."

**(Three Months Later)**

"_Flack!_" Danny yelled as the other detective spun on his heel and started to almost run in the opposite direction. "Hold it right there!"

"What'dya want, Messer?" Flack asked as Danny caught up to him.

"Where is she?" Danny demanded.

"No way. I value my life too much," Flack responded. "She does _not_ want to see you."

"Come on, it's killing me. I know you know where she is. She's your cousin for god's sake. Just..." Danny ran a hand through his hair. "All right. You won't tell me where she is. I screwed up, I get that. Is she okay? Does she need anything?"

Flack sighed. "She's fine. Healthy. Everything's going the way it should. I'll tell her you asked about her and I'll see if she'll consider talking to you." He held up his hand when Danny broke out in a wide grin. "But I'm not promising anything. Melly's a hormonal bitch when she's not pregnant."

"Thanks, Flack. Just..._please_...tell her I want to talk to her."

"Yeah, well, you screwed up, Danny, but I'll talk to her." The other detective turned and walked away. Danny didn't even try to follow him, Flack would know immediately if he was being followed.

**(One Month Later)**

Danny nodded to the uniforms as he ducked under the crime scene tape at the bodega. "What've we got, Flack?" he asked as he approached the other detective.

Flack flipped his memo book open and consulted his notes. "Owner of the bodega is Manuel Ortega, fifty-five. He was closing up for the evening when the perp busted in and robbed him at gun point. Mr. Ortega handed over the money and then the perp shot him point blank. I've got someone pulling the tapes for ya. There doesn't appear to be any witnesses, but I'll go do some door knocking anyway."

Danny set his kit down and looked around the scene, taking in first impressions as he got his camera out. "Neighborhood like this nobody saw nothing, I'm sure." He stood up to start taking overalls of the scene and tried to ask causally, "Did you talk to Melinda yet?"

Flack paused mid-step, turning to face Danny again. "Um, yeah. She still doesn't want to see you."

Danny hung his head, although he really wasn't surprised by the answer. "She's still doing good though? She's okay?"

"Yeah, she's fine. Taking a little bit of a vacation right now. She went to visit some friends for a while," Flack answered. He considered Danny, who had been looking more and more haggard as the month wore on, and offered, "She's done with the morning sickness finally and starting to put on some weight."

Danny smiled. "That's good to hear. Good that she's getting away from the city." He dug into his pocket and pulled out a wad of bills, passing them over to his friend. "Can you give this to her the next time you see her? Its for the doctor or whatever. For whatever she needs."

Flack raised an eyebrow as he took the money. "It's a little late for an abortion, Danny, not that she would ever consider that."

Danny was horrified. "No. Not for that. I mean she's gotta go get check-ups and stuff, right? And she's gonna need stuff for the baby. God, I would never ask her to do that, no matter what my feelings." Danny turned back to the scene. "I just want to help her. I know she doesn't want to see me, but..." he trailed off. "Just give her the money, okay?"

The other detective nodded. "Yeah. Fine. This isn't going to change her mind though."

"I'm not trying to change her mind anymore, Don," Danny said as he raised the camera to go back to his job. "I'm trying to fix my screw-up. And I noticed she ditched her cell."

"Yeah. She's got a new one and, no, I am not giving you the number." He decided to be kind to his friend. "I do know she put your number into the new one though."

"Thanks," Danny said, knowing that Melinda wouldn't be happy that Flack gave him that information.

Flack nodded. "You okay here? I'm gonna go do those door to doors."

"Yeah. I'm fine." Bending over, he pulled some things out of his kit and began processing the scene.

Flack paused for a moment and studied his friend. He wanted to tell Danny more, but knew Melinda wouldn't be happy with him if he did. She didn't seem as mad at Danny now, although he knew she was still hurt by whatever had happened between them when she found out she was pregnant. He motioned to one of the uniforms to follow him, leaving the other to watch the scene and the blond CSI.

**(Five Months Later)**

Danny looked up into Flack's grinning face as an envelope landed on his desk. "What's this?" he asked.

"Open it," Flack responded, dropping into the chair next to the desk.

Aiden poked her head over from her desk that faced Danny's. "Ooo, what'cha got?" she questioned.

Danny shrugged and turned the envelope over. "It's not going to explode on me, is it?" he asked.

"No. She's not that mad at you anymore, although she might have done that a month ago." Flack shook his head. "I didn't realize she knew that many swear words."

Danny looked up from where he had been fiddling with the flap. "She had the baby?"

"Open it," Flack encouraged.

Danny slit the envelope open and dumped the contents onto his desk. He flipped the pictures over and stared down at the tired, but happy face of Melinda. She was cradling a blue wrapped bundle, holding the baby up so that whoever had taken the picture could see him. Danny traced her face with a finger, then turned his attention to the other picture. It was a typical hospital shot of a baby boy. "She had a boy?" he asked.

"Yeah and for reasons I _cannot_ understand, she named him after you," Flack responded. He indicated the last item. "Read it."

Danny picked it up as Aiden took the pictures, cooing over the baby. "_Daniel Messer Costas_," he read silently. "_Born May 27, 2003 at 8:04 am. Seven pounds, six ounces and twenty inches long._" Underneath the birth information, Melinda had scrawled, _I still don't want to see you, but you deserve to know you have a son._ He looked up at Flack when he finished reading. "So he's a month old? She's okay?"

"Yes, she's fine. Dad took her to the hospital when she went into labor and I was there, too. She still doesn't want to see you, but she wanted you to know about the baby. We've been calling him D." Flack got to his feet. "I'd suggest sending her flowers or something. Or maybe going to the baby store. Try making amends or you aren't ever going to see the kid."

Danny looked at Aiden as Flack walked away. "But I still don't know where she is."

Aiden shook her head and tossed the pictures back onto his desk. "Men," she said and handed him the phone book. "Start with flowers. Send them to Flack's dad's place. We'll go shopping after shift."

**(Later That Evening)**

Aiden pulled up in front of the senior Flack's house on Staten Island. Danny looked up at it in worry. "Are you sure she's here?" he asked.

"Yes. I called earlier and talked to Detective Flack." Even though Don's father had retired years before, he was still well-known in the force; a legend among the younger officers, and they spoke to him with respect. "Come on, stop being such a chicken shit."

"Oh, yeah, that's helpful, Aiden," Danny replied.

Aiden contorted around and grabbed a couple of the bags in the back. "Get the rest," she ordered. "Including your glove. Still can't figure out why you had to buy a baseball glove for a month old baby."

Danny shrugged, taking hold of the bags she had left. Aiden had made him buy gift bags and put the stuff in them instead of leaving them in the shopping sacks. "It's a guy thing," he explained. "Melinda'll get it." He followed Aiden up the walk. "If she'll speak to me."

Aiden shifted things around so she could ring the bell. "We'll try."

A moment later the door swung open. Danny had a second to drink in the sight of Melinda, still slightly round from the pregnancy, before she said, "Oh, fuck," and slammed the door.

The two CSIs exchanged glances. "Yup, still pissed," Danny confirmed.

Aiden grinned as she rang the bell again. "Gotta admit she holds a grudge well." When Melinda opened it this time, she quickly stuck her foot in the jam before the other woman could shut it again. "Hey, Mel. I know you're still mad at this idiot and you have every right to be, but he'd like to try to make it up to you."

Melinda sighed and started to answer, but was interrupted by a wail from another part of the house. "You're here. You might as well come in." She opened the door wider and allowed them both entry as the cries increased in volume and duration. "I have to go get D," she told them before heading towards the back of the house.

Aiden nudged Danny when he didn't move from the foyer. "Well? Follow her."

"She didn't tell me to," he protested.

Aiden rolled her eyes and shoved him in the right direction. "Trust me that was your engraved invitation," she informed him.

They used the sound of the cries as a guide, discovering Melinda in a smaller room towards the back of the house. It was painted a bright, cheery yellow; except for one wall which had a mural of the Central Park Zoo on it. Danny remembered that one of Melinda's cousins was an artist and wondered if Micah had painted it for the baby. As they entered, Melinda finished changing D and picked him up, cooing above the cries, "I know you're hungry, baby boy, just a minute." She settled herself in the rocker, then unbuttoned her shirt and unselfconsciousnessly bared her breast and guided D to the nipple. His cries quieted as he started sucking. She looked up at Danny when she was certain the baby was feeding. "Do you want to see him?"

"Am I allowed?" he asked, setting the bags on the floor.

"You're here. You might as well see him," she replied, but Danny remained by the doorway.

"I want to see him," Aiden told her when Danny still didn't move after a few moments. Melinda shifted the baby, but was careful not to disturb him too much. Aiden crouched down next to her and smiled at the baby. "He's so tiny."

"Not so much when you're trying to push him out," Melinda answered dryly. "Come on, Danny."

Danny stuck his hands in his pockets and shifted his feet, refusing to admit that he wanted to get closer to her. "I don't want to disturb him while he's eating," he said.

"Trust me, he's pretty much got a one track mind at this age. You coming closer won't even register," Melinda explained.

Danny crept forward and knelt down next to her chair. Tentatively, he reached out and ran a finger down the baby's head. "We made this?" he asked in awe.

Melinda smiled at the look of wonderment on Danny's face. It wasn't an expression she had seen before. "Yeah," she told him softly, "we did." The look was almost enough to melt the hurt she was still holding onto.

When he bent forward and placed a gentle kiss on the crown of the baby's head, she felt her heart crack. "Hi, D," he whispered to the baby. "I'm your daddy."

Melinda and Aiden's eyes met over Danny's head which was still inclined over the baby. "Forgive him," Aiden mouthed.

Melinda shook her head and answered, "I can't."

"Can't what?" Danny asked.

"Nothing." Melinda shifted D away from her breast, closing up her shirt as she moved him, and put him against her shoulder. She patted his back until he burped. "Do you want to hold him?"

Danny jumped up and backed away, panic clear on his face. "No. No!" he protested. "Definitely not!"

Melinda laughed at his expression as she got to her feet. Balancing D against her shoulder, she pushed Danny into the chair. "You need to bond with your son," she informed him before arranging the baby in his arms. "So what's in the bags?" she asked Aiden.

Aiden grinned as she watched the normally confident Danny try to balance the baby. "Baby stuff and some mama stuff, too."

"Melinda, I'm gonna drop him," Danny pointed out.

The new mother patiently re-arranged his hands and arm so that D was sitting more comfortably. "No, you won't," she assured him. "Just be sure to support his head and neck and you two will be fine."

"Why don't you open them?" Aiden suggested.

Melinda dropped cross-legged on the floor. "Ooo, presents," she squealed jokingly.

Danny smiled at her, a little more comfortable now with the baby. "You sound like such a girl," he commented.

"Um, Danny, in the the baby in your arms wasn't clue enough, you just saw my breasts," Melinda replied.

Aiden choked back a laugh, not wanting to damage the fragile peace they seemed to have established, and pushed the bags towards the other woman. "Open." She glanced at Danny. "Although I'm not sure about the one thing the _man_ over there bought."

Melinda raised an eyebrow as she opened the first bag. "Should I be worried?" she asked, pulling the contents out and examining the onesies and other small clothes that had been inside.

"Nah, you'll get it," Danny called from where he sat. "Aiden just doesn't understand." He turned his attention to the baby as D stirred. "Hi, little guy," Danny greeted him as his eyes opened. "Hey, Melinda, his eyes are blue!"

Melinda rolled her eyes and exchanged smiles with Aiden. "Yes, Danny," she said patiently. "All babies have blue eyes at this age, but I suspect his will stay blue." She reached for another bag as she finished speaking.

"That's the one I dunno about," Aiden said.

"Why will his eyes stay blue?" Danny asked.

"Because you and I both have blue eyes," Melinda answered. "Geez, Danny, did you sleep through genetics?" She pulled a tiny Yankees jersey out of the bag and smiled. "Yankees, Danny? Do you want my family to disown D? And was this what you were worried about, Aiden?"

"Hey, no making fun of the Bombers," Danny protested.

"No, it's the other thing that's in the bag," Aiden responded.

Melinda reached into the bag and pulled out the glove. Laughing, she held it up. "So you want to teach him to play?" she asked.

Danny nodded. "Every boy needs a glove."

Melinda pointed towards the corner where some other sports equipment rested. "Well, you can fight it out with Donnie and Paddy. They got him a basketball and a hockey stick."

"No football?" Danny questioned.

She shook her head. "No, I draw the line at my son playing that barbaric sport. And I'm probably going to veto the hockey, too. He can play for fun on the street, but that's it."

Danny tried to shift, but stopped when he felt the baby moving. "Don't be cruel to him, Melinda, let him be a boy."

She got to her feet and took the baby from him, cooing when he started to fuss. "He'll be a boy, Danny, but I'm not gonna let him get beat up for fun."

Danny didn't bother protesting since it was an argument they'd had before, instead he flexed his arms which had gone to sleep from holding the baby. "He's heavier than I thought he would be."

Melinda nodded as she swayed from side to side, patting his back and jiggling D until he settled back down. "It's because he's dead weight." She turned as they all heard the front door slam. "Donnie, we're back in D's room," she called.

"We who?" Flack called back. A moment later, he stuck his head in the door. "Oh. Hey, Aiden and Danny. You okay, Melly?"

"Yeah, Donnie. I'm fine." She grinned at Danny, who had tensed at the appearance of the other detective. "He's behaving."

Flack nodded. "Good. Hey, Aiden. You wanna help me get drinks for everyone?"

Melinda looked over her shoulder from where she was laying D back in his crib. "Oh, that was real subtle, Donnie. Why don't you just say 'Aiden, come with me so Danny and Melinda can talk privately'?"

He shrugged. "Hey, I'm a guy, that's as subtle as I get. Aiden?"

"Yeah, I'm coming." She glared at Danny for a moment. "Try not to piss her off again," she cautioned.

Danny waited until he was pretty sure they were both out of earshot before speaking. "I got you something. Well, Aiden helped me pick it out, but I made the final decision." He reached into one of the bags she hadn't opened and pulled a small box out, handing it over to her.

Melinda considered the box for a few moments. It was the right size and shape for a ring box, but she had a feeling that wasn't what it was. "Danny, this isn't," she started.

"No. No," he hastened to reassure her. "I know better than to ask you that now. I just thought you would like something to keep a picture of D in."

Confused now, she opened the box and gasped, "Oh, Danny, it's beautiful." Carefully, she lifted the locket out of the case. It was a gold two inch heart with a blue and green stone down near the point. Sliding her fingernail into the slit, she opened it up. "I'll have to have a picture printed for it," she told him when she saw the size of the space.

"Let me put it on you?" he requested when she had closed it again.

She handed it over and turned around, lifting her hair out of the way. "I love it, Danny. Thank you."

After placing it on her, he stepped away, not wanting to push. "I'm glad you let me see him. Is there anything you need?"

"I'm good right now. Uncle Don's been great. I think he just likes having a baby around again. And Donnie's been surprisingly helpful." Melinda settled back in the rocker again and began picking through the other bags, smiling at the toys and clothes in them.

"But is there anything _I_ can do for you?" Danny pressed.

Melinda stopped fussing with the clothes and looked up at him. "I can't go there yet, Danny. You hurt me too badly. More than anything, your knee-jerk reaction was you weren't ready. That hasn't really changed in ten months. You tried to contact me, Donnie told me that, but I really still don't think you're ready." She held up a hand when he opened his mouth to protest. "No. _No._ I get to make the decision about this. I'm not ready to take you back. If you want to see D, that's fine. You can see him. He's your son and I would never deny you that. But I'm not ready for anything else. And I'm not sure I want to be here when you come to see him."

"All right. I can understand that," he admitted. "I know I fucked up." He knelt down next to her. "I'm sorry."

"That means a lot to me, Danny. When you want to see D, let Donnie know and I'll clear out."

He nodded. "I want to give you money to help with D's care. Will you take it?"

She considered him for a few minutes, knowing that to turn him down would start a vicious argument again. It wouldn't cost her anything to take the money from him and she knew he would feel more a part of D's life if he was contributing. "Yes, but not a lot. I'm doing fine."

Danny agreed quickly, "All right." As Flack and Aiden re-entered the room, he moved away from her, taking the bags and setting them out of the way.

"Everything okay?" Flack asked as he handed Melinda her Pepsi.

Melinda socked him gently on the arm. "Would you stop asking that? God, you're acting neurotic. He's not gonna jump me or something. You can leave me alone for five minutes, you worry wort."

"Hey, you're my little cousin, I get to worry," Flack replied as he sat down with his back against the wall.

"Well, stop. I gave birth and I survived talking to Danny and look..." she waved around the room, "no blood."

Aiden snorted, trying to hold in a laugh. "So I'm gathering you two made up?"

Danny and Melinda exchanged glances, then she got up as D started to stir in his crib. Patting his back, she answered, "We've agreed not to fight. He's going to get to see D, but Donnie's gonna be here and not me when he does. Anything else is none of your business."

Aiden raised her glass. "Fair enough. So do I get to hold D?"

Melinda grinned. "Let me change him again and then absolutely." Leaning down, she lifted her son out of his crib and turned towards the changing table. She caught sight of Danny watching her out of the corner of her eye and wondered briefly if they would ever go forward together or if this was the way their interactions were going to be now; their only connection the small life in her arms.


End file.
